Commitment or somewhere between trust and let go

« Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes. » ~ Walt Whitman

I wrote the below piece some time ago. It still touches me deeply. My relationship with commitment is ambiguous. I am full of paradoxes. I want to build, I want long term goals, stability and, at the very same time, I cherish freedom, spontaneity and space for new adventures. I celebrate life exactly as it is here and now and I aim high, both for myself and others. Needless to say it is a little bit chaotic from time to time! 🙂 Playing with this complexity is a tricky game. Balance is a myth. We are all work in progress. As long as we grow, move forward and make adjustments, all is fine. I have no answers or tips. I believe life is a mystery and we all learn through experience rather than intellect. Before, I was trying to stop the pain, hide from the darkness that I could sense coming from a big black hole inside me. Now, I let myself go more and more. I trust the process, my guts and my vulnerability. Thanks God there is dance, music, sun, wind, daylight, water, poetry, art, laughter and warm hearts around me. And there is chocolate. Someone has planned the whole experience pretty well. 🙂

“Love so deeply that even the darkness feels welcomed.” ~ Rune Lazuli

 

Somewhere between trust and let go

I feel grateful and at peace.
It is good to be committed to a relationship, a job or a company.
It is good to be committed to one’s own growth, desires, needs, projects, dreams and hopes.
It is good to be committed to oneself, to here and now, to life.
Not for as to control, possess or improve.
But to grow, nurture, accept and thus fully enjoy, celebrate and cherish.
The one and only thing that will occur for sure is change.
So let’s appreciate what happens to us now. It shall pass.
So let’s commit, in spite of uncertainty, without attachment to a specific result, just for the sake of love.
So let’s move gently with the flow, and enjoy the now, and the new.
So let’s have some fun, even though there will be pain too.
This is the price of living passionately.
This is the price of commitment.
And there will be sweet and spicy surprises too.
We have come full circle. The vicious or the virtuous one?
A matter of perspective.

 

“To be creative means to be in love with life. You can be creative only if you love life enough that you want to enhance its beauty, you want to bring a little more music to it, a little more poetry to it, a little more dance to it.” ~ Osho

 

“This is going to sound crazy. Say yes to everything. Accept all offers. Go along with the plan. Support someone else’s dream. Say « yes »; « right »; « sure »; « I will »; « okay »; « of course »; « YES! » Cultivate all the ways you can imagine to express affirmation. When the answer to all questions is yes, you enter a new world, a world of action, possibility, and adventure.” ~ Patricia Ryan Madson

 

“Love me when I am rain, hold me when I am fire.” ~ Rune Lazuli

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